Burn After Opening
by MistedVines
Summary: Sakura’s gotten herself a genie. An annoying, persistent, moody genie that’s dead set on helping her find love. And ruining her simple life in the process. Sakura centric.


Burn After Opening

Sakura's gotten herself a genie. An annoying, persistent, moody genie that's dead set on helping her find love. And ruining her simple life in the process. Sakura centric

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Unfortunately.

* * *

Sakura sat silently in the living room, back pressed against the wall as she stared at the small leather-bound book in front of her that lay resting on the faded grey carpet. Such an ugly carpet. She'd despised it since the day she and her mother had moved in. Sitting directly behind the book, staring back at Sakura with a bored expression was a slim, red-haired girl who chewed her gum noisily. The girl huffed loudly, shifting around; making the tight top she wore stretch tighter yet over her ample bosom. Her outfit was a bit much - the jacket (the only thing she wore on her upper half) was shameless, held together with only one button. Her shorts could barely be called that--riding high on her thighs and showing off the graceful length of her legs. "So," the girl said loudly, breaking the frail silence hanging over them.

Sakura raised one slim brow, waiting. "So?" she allowed.

"I'm Karin. Your genie." She'd already said this, of course. She'd said it the moment she'd tumbled out of the book Sakura'd been reading and into Sakura's unsuspecting lap. And then she'd said it again when Sakura had stared at her blankly, impassive face giving away nothing. "Urg," the girl moaned, flapping her arms in the air. "Come on! Ask for something--demand to know how many wishes you get! Anything!"

Sakura, who rarely spoke and, even more rarely, voiced her desire for material objects, continued to stare at the girl. "I have no need for you." She said at length, "you can go back now." Gesturing to the black book Sakura hoped the girl would leave so she could go back to her favorite past time; staring blankly at the peeling paint in her small apartment.

"God I wish it was that simple," Karin moaned, placing her perfectly manicured nails on her hips and glaring at Sakura. "But it's not. I can't leave until I've completed my job."

Sakura blinked very slowly, interest caught. "Your job?"

Karin frowned. "Yeah. I have to help you gain your hearts true desire."

Interest lost completely. "I have no '_true desire'_, as you so put it."

"You do too. The book wouldn't have called me out if you didn't." Karin folded her arms across her chest, meeting Sakura's stubborn look with one of her own. "Look, I don't want to be here any more than you want me here. So why don't you just do a quick internal scan and tell me what you've always wanted. Okay?"

"I want nothing." Sakura insisted, keeping her voice level. She sighed, tilting her head back against the dirty wall behind her and closing her eyes. "Can't you just pretend you fixed me and leave?"

Karin snorted. "The book will just spit me right back out. How about if I'm a boy--would you like me more then?"

"No."

"Fine," Karin said sulkily, toying with her hair as she settled back down, resigning herself to another hour of dull silence. Unused to being shot down, Karin could only pray in silence that someone would take pity on her and allow her back into her own world and out of the humans. She'd been a fool to accept the position of genie - not only did it pay terribly (the outfit _was_ cute, however) but she had to deal with horrible, selfish humans on a daily basis. She should have listened to her mother when she'd been warned against taking the frivolous job. "Hey," Karin chirped after another painfully slow minute of silence. "You still haven't told me your name!"

The pink-haired girl looked over at her, the flat, dull look in her eyes making the smile on Karin's lips twitch and nearly fail. "Haruno, Sakura."

It was an uninspired voice - as dull and unappealing as the rest of the girl. Karin studied the knee length socks and formal school uniform with a look of disgust--really, who wore their shirts buttoned to the top with the jacket and tie on? Horrible clothing. If Karin had any say in it, the clothes would've been burned the day they came into her pretty hands. Worse than the uniform, was the girl's stringy, long unkempt hair. It hung down and shadowed the face beneath. Large round glasses with thick frames completed the look; _typical nerd_. The only thing that contradicted her image, was the chilling 'I'm-too-cool-for-you' aura the girl illuminated.

Karin shuddered at the girl's bitten down nails and hairy legs. Geez. What girl didn't shave now a days? That was Stone Age barbaric. "So, it's Sakura-chan, eh? Pretty, er, name."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "I know what you're thinking. That's its unfitting on someone like me." The girl placed a hand on her knee and pushed herself up. "I'm going to make something to eat. I'd really rather you were gone when I return."

"I already told you I can't leave!" Karin whined, standing as well, hovering just behind Sakura. "I'm stuck here until you make your wish!"

"Very well," Sakura turned, looking at Karin. "I wish you would go back to wherever it is you came from. Goodbye, Karin."

Karin's pointer and middle fingers glowed a pale blue for a fraction of a second before the glow faded. "Damn it!" Karin wailed, shaking her hand. "Stupid magic! Stupid humans! I hate this job - I'm not getting paid enough to do this! I don't care if the boss has a nice ass; I can't look at it from here."

Sakura ignored the pretty girl as she continued to complain, heading from the tiny living room to the even smaller kitchen, stepping around the backpack that she'd dropped carelessly when she'd first gotten home. She paused before the fridge, knowing there wasn't going to be anything good to eat inside it, but still hoping something might have changed. When she opened it, an expired carton of milk and a lone egg stared back at her disappointed face. Sakura reached in for the egg, wishing she'd gotten her pay check early that week and not later. It was going to be difficult waiting out the last two days of the week eating only the lone loaf of bread.

But, it wasn't the first time she'd done it, so Sakura knew she'd manage. Karin watched her reach into the bare cupboard for a frying pan - coming back out with one so worn and old that it was no longer blue, as it'd been when her mother had bought it years earlier, but a dull gray. The girl kicked the stove roughly when the gas didn't come on and then pulled back as gas shot high off the burners and then settled back down. She reached into her back pocket for a lighter and lit the gas, setting the frying pan atop it and waiting for it to heat up. Like she'd been doing since Karin had arrived, she entertained herself by staring blankly ahead at the off-white walls of her home.

Karin had to admit that Sakura was probably one of the strangest humans she'd come across in all her six hundred years of life. And she'd gotten some weirdoes in the past. "I'm hungry." She announced, watching as Sakura twitched out of her daydreaming. "Is that really all you've got to eat?"

"Yes." Sakura responded, not turning back to look at the girl. It was fairly obvious she had no intention of sharing her meager meal.

Karin groaned. "What? God, are you really that poor?"

"Yes."

Thrown off, Karin stared blankly at the girl before sighing angrily. "Fine. Wish me some food."

"No. I'm not wishing for anything." Sakura waved a hand over the pan, face falling when she found the pan to still not be hot enough to cook anything yet.

"Don't be a stubborn idiot." Karin groused, her hand falling back onto her hip. "Just repeat after me - _I wish for more eggs._ Do it."

Sakura gave up on waiting, cracking the egg against the side of the pan and opening it skillfully with one hand. She threw the shell at the bag-less trash can at the end of the cabinets. The egg sizzled quietly on the pan and she searched around through the dirty dishes waiting to be washed for a spatula. She rinsed the spatula off and returned her attention to the egg.

"Oh that's disgusting," Karin moaned, looking appalled. "You didn't even clean that!"

"So?" Sakura replied easily, sliding the wet spatula under the egg and flipping it cleanly. "What do you care--you're not eating it."

"Don't worry, you don't have to be so defensive of your little egg; there's no way I'm eating that now." With every passing minute, it seemed this host was going to make Karin's life more and more hellacious. With a resigned sigh the girl plopped into an uncomfortable chair and watched Sakura cook. "So--why won't you wish for anything?"

"Wishing gets you nowhere." Sakura told the girl, flipping off the stove and setting the frying pan on a cool burner. She searched through the dirty water for another dirty dish, this time coming back with a plate and fork. She rinsed these off as well before she transitioned the egg to the plate and joined Karin at the table. "It's a useless endeavor."

"It is not," Karin snapped, offended that her job was being insulted so casually. "Wishing is a great thing--it gives you hope and makes you humans optimistic!"

"Whatever." Sakura chewed the rubbery egg silently, trying to think back on the things she'd done that could have resulted in karma delivering this slap to the face. She couldn't think of any bad enough to deserve behind stuck with Karin. Sakura ate in silence, Karin bubbling with misplaced rage and Sakura letting her mind wander. Her stomach still felt empty even after the egg was gone and Sakura pushed the feeling from her mind, rising and moving into the one bedroom the apartment offered. Sakura and her mother shared the room - when her mother came home from her drunken binges and sleazy boyfriends, that was. The room sported one twin sized mattress, barely enough room for two people, and a dresser. The dresser was ancient and missing almost all of the paint it had once had - but it was an important piece of her childhood, and Sakura wouldn't let it go for all the money in the world.

Sakura began to strip out of her school uniform, kicking the clothing around the room, uncaring of where it landed. She opened the top drawer of the dresser, retrieving a shorter, frillier outfit from within. The diner where she worked wasn't the nicest of places - sitting right in the slummiest part of town - but it paid well and it was all she had going for her at the moment. Sakura, despite her grungy appearance (she purposefully abstained from shaving her legs, but it didn't stop the men in the restaurant from brushing their fingers down her legs as she past by) was still harassed constantly by the opposite sex. But she was used to it by now, and had gotten good at ignoring the lingering touches; it often meant a higher tip when they left.

Karin had followed her into the bedroom and now watched as she did up the zipper in back and smoothed the slimming, short one-piece dress uniform over her thin body. It was an ugly pale yellow that did absolutely nothing for her, but she couldn't find it in herself to care. Sakura had resigned herself to a life of being plain, and it wasn't ever going to get any better. "I'm going to work," she told Karin, brushing her long hair back into a ponytail and tying it tightly. "I guess if you really can't go back, you can stay here. If my mom comes home just pretend you're me. She won't be able to tell the difference."

"You're kidding right?" Karin asked, eyebrows raised. "We look _nothing_ alike."

"When and if you meet her, you'll understand," Sakura insisted. She shoved her feet back into her converse and tied up the laces in a hurry. "I have a five hour shift so I'll be back around ten, unless I close and then it'll be around eleven."

"Whoa, slow down, honey." Karin shook her head fiercely. "I'm not just going to sit around here for hours waiting for you. I'm coming!"

Sakura shook her head. "It won't be any different at my work - you'll still have to sit the whole time."

"Yeah, but at least this way I can _watch _people. I'm not going to be left here alone." Karin had crossed her arms over her chest once more and Sakura took this pose to be her stubborn one. "You're not leaving here without me."

Sakura glanced at the clock sitting on the dresser that told her she had thirty minutes to get to work and clock in. "Fine. I don't care. Come on then." Sakura flicked off the lights as she left the room, grabbing her wallet and keys and shoving them into her apron. Karin rushed back into the living room, grabbing her high-heeled boots and slipping back into them as she hastened to catch up to Sakura. Sakura, who ignored Karin when she complained about the cold weather, locked the deadbolt and stared at the gold 201 that proclaimed her apartment number--the one was hanging crookedly; about to fall off. She didn't have the time or money to spare on fixing it.

Sakura counted out the spare change she hand on hand, making sure she hand enough for Karin to ride the bus with her as well. Picking up the pace so they wouldn't miss the bus, Sakura handed Karin the quarters. "You'll need this to get on the bus--don't lose it."

"I've ridden a bus before, human," Karin sniffed, scrunching her nose delicately as the putrid smell of the metal coins reached her. "Gross," the red-haired girl moaned, shoving the coins away from her body, though she didn't loosen her hold on them. "Where have you been storing these things, they smell terrible!"

"It's money," Sakura replied, not interested in Karin's complaining. She came to a stop by the pole marking the bus stop, sitting on the cold metal bench while she waited. "Money always smells bad."

"Not like this," the girl argued, annoyed that Sakura wasn't agreeing with her on the point. She was interrupted from whatever she was going to say next by a large city bus lurching to a shuddering stop in front of them, the door squeaking open. The driver let his eyes skim over Karin's revealing outfit approvingly, though the girl didn't notice or seem to care. She threw her coins into the coin-collector in disgust and rubbing her hand against her shorts. Sakura followed suit, dropping the coins and holding her hand out to the driver.

"Transfer, please." The man finally looked away from Karin and up at Sakura, his face crinkling as he took in her less-than impressive appearance. "One for my friend as well." Sakura curled her hand around the offered slips of paper and followed Karin into the back of the bus, not stumbling forward like Karin when it pulled away from the curb. She handed the transfer over to Karin, warning her not to lose this either. Because now they didn't have any spare change to pay for a ride back. Sakura would have her tips - though her boss tended to require his waitresses hand in their tips as taxes. It left Sakura's pockets even emptier. And with the electric bill overdo and her water about to be shut off, she couldn't afford to loose even a little money. With her meager pay check, Sakura could barely get by on the bills - but that left her with little money for food, which probably wouldn't get her through two weeks even if she ate only one meal a day. Of course, on days when Naruto was working in the kitchens, he always made her a plate of food, and paid for it too. Normally not one to take anything given to her, Sakura had somehow never been able to say no to Naruto.

Sakura, so absorbed in her thoughts, nearly missed their stop. She stood, yanking once on the cord and listening for the ding of the bell - the driver reluctantly slid to a stop, glaring at the girls for waiting until the last minute to announce their stop. Sakura ignored him, concentrating instead on preparing herself for another long, tiring afternoon of work. Karin hopped off the bus after her--not before winking playfully at the bus driver, snickering when he choked in surprise--and kept directly behind Sakura.

"What do you do, anyway?" Karin asked as they walked along the busy street towards the flashing neon sign that read the name of Sakura's work. "This isn't a very nice place," she added in a softer voice, glaring at a man who leered suggestively as they passed.

"I'm a waitress. I said you didn't have to come," Sakura reminded the girl, starting across the parking lot towards the rundown diner. Her boss was waiting outside, looking furious.

"Ten minutes!" he exploded, grabbing Sakura's arm as soon as she was within arms reach, his round face was a dangerous red - as it got when Sakura was about to receive a _long_ lecture. His mustache twitched and sweat pooled at the top of his bald head. With his free hand he pressed a handkerchief against the sweat, attempting to mop it up. "You're late _again_ Haruno-san. I've half a mind to fire you for it this time!"

It was an empty threat; it taken him months for him to find enough of a staff willing to work in the horrible place. If Sakura left he'd be short again -- not to mention he'd probably have to hire extra since Sakura did the work of at least two people. "I'm sorry, sir," she said, not meaning a word of it. "My cousin came into town."

The man finally took in the sight of Karin beside Sakura, the color draining from his face as he realized her eyes were trained on his sausage-like fingers wrapped painfully tight around Sakura's wrist. He hastily dropped the girl's arm. "Ah, ha," he laughed nervously and mopped frantically at his shiny scalp. "So sorry, dear. Don't know what came over me." He turned on heel, retreating into the restaurant without looking back.

Karin rubbed a hand through her uneven hair, looking displeased. "I don't like this place. You shouldn't work here." Her glossed lips pressed together in a firm pout as she glared at Sakura--irritated that the girl was ignoring her, once again, and entering the building without a word of response. "Fine. Whatever. Don't listen to me! I'll just rot in this hovel forever!" Karin threw her hands in the air for dramatic emphasis, but followed Sakura none-the-less. How could Sasuke do this to her? This was the worst job assignment she'd gotten since that idiot man who'd wished for the power to turn things he'd touched into gold (then again, the cleanup of that wish was absolutely _horrible_. Karin never wanted to see Itachi that mad again).

Sakura motioned for Karin to sit in a booth at the back, attempting to shield the taller girl from the curious glances of the diner's patrons. She returned a moment later with a pen and paper. "Amuse yourself." Karin was told and then left alone as Sakura went around taking orders and filling empty coffee cups. Karin, who was amused by doodling little pictures of Sasuke's head blowing up for all of ten minutes, was horrified by Sakura's lack of care for (they hadn't been in the place more than forty minutes and it'd happened at least three times) the men who watched her with lascivious eyes, letting their fingers linger on her as she moved past. She handled it with the air of someone who'd long gotten used to being treated in such a degrading manner.

Karin frowned, tapping the table with glowing fingers and nodding in satisfaction when the book she'd left at Sakura's home - the one she'd come from - formed in front of her with a quiet pop. Making sure no one had seen, Karin flipped the book open, staring down at Sakura's profile picture. As always, the book offered her information on her new charge. "Seventeen?" she murmured aloud in horror, looking back at Sakura. She'd been working at this shit hole for two years according to her data - having gotten the job after her mother had been arrested and lost her (somewhat) respectable job as maid for one of the larger hotels in the city. Karin read on, slowly coming to the realization that this was probably the worst case that had ever been dealt to her. She'd never met a human with so many problems or such a horrible life. In fact, since her first assignment, Sasuke had been sure to give her fairly mainstream clients, knowing her whining would be too much to bear if he gave her something harder.

So what gave?

Karin tapped her nails thoughtfully against the table, chewing on her lower lip. It was pretty obvious Sakura needed help--and not just with her image. Her life was a total train wreck; her mother a deadbeat fool and her father six feet under the ground. She'd been taking care of herself since his death when she was eight, after her mother's following breakdown and decent into alcohol. It was going to be difficult, considering Sakura's stubborn personality and aversion to any outside help, despite the fact she was nearly bankrupt and about to be evicted from her trashy apartment. But Karin was bored, and the only way she'd _ever_ be able to leave and kick Sasuke's gorgeous ass, was to help her.

So what did Sakura need? Money, obviously. Money was a good start, but the girl wasn't superficial and her heart's desire had to be something deeper. Companionship? Love? Karin sighed, wishing Suigetsu had been assigned this case. The asshole deserved a good challenge. A steaming plate was laid in front of her and Karin followed the hand holding it up to Sakura's glasses. The light was reflecting off them and shielding her eyes from view. "Here," the girl announced. "You're in luck; Naruto made me something today. Enjoy."

"Whoa," Karin said, looking down at the triple pancakes smothered in maple syrup and bacon. "Isn't this for you, though?"

"I already ate." Sakura said carelessly, turning back to her work.

Karin picked up the silverware she'd been left, staring after Sakura with a contemplative look. The girl had a hard exterior, but she was still a good person - this really _was_ going to be difficult. Karin sighed and speared the pancakes her with her fork, letting her mind drift back into her previous thoughts. Love, she finally decided, was what Sakura needed. Now all she had to do was convince the girl to start wishing for the things she really wanted. Satisfied with her conclusion, Karin dug into the food, pleasantly surprised to find it was delicious.

The time passed more quickly after that, Karin pouring herself into reading everything in Sakura's profile, attempting to dissect the girl through her reading. Though she worked all weekend and every night, Sakura was still an honor roll student, passing every one of her classes with A's. Her attendance record was spotless - she also took extra classes in math and science and the teachers thought she was the most amazing thing since sliced bread. Her classmates disagreed. Sakura had, according to page 45, one friend--and not even really a good friend at that. Hinata Hyuuga. Apparently they _nodded_ to each other in the halls and had been recorded talking once or twice during a pep rally. Karin withheld a noise of disapproval.

A glance at the clock on the wall told Karin she still had two hours before Sakura was getting off work. The girl growled under her breath and waited until Sakura glanced her way a few minutes later to wave her over. Sakura refilled a man's cup with coffee and then made her way over to the corner bench, raising an eyebrow. "What?"

"Please - I _know_ you hate wishes and what not, but for god sakes, Sakura, can't you please just wish that I had some money so I can go shopping or something?" Karin made sure to keep her eyes pleading as she stared at Sakura. "Besides, if I'm going to be here awhile I'll need clothes!"

Sakura hesitated, her face pinching. "Fine," she finally sighed, shifting her stance uneasily. "What do I need to say?"

"_'I wish you had as much money as you need.'_ Or something to that effect," Karin told her, feeling relived the girl had caved.

Sakura huffed, repeating dutifully, "I with that you have as much money as you need to go shopping. Happy?"

On the table, Karin's hand glowed, and a moment later the girl reached into her pocket, coming back with a gold credit card - probably holding a million or so dollars. She didn't think telling Sakura that would be a good idea. There was a large wad of cash wrapped around the credit card as well and, further down in her pocket, there was five small gold coins; money from her own world. "Very happy," Karin grinned, standing and grabbing her doodles and the book off the table. "I'll be back when you get off work. See ya."

"Bye," Sakura replied, heading over to a woman who had her coffee cup raised in the air and was snapping at Sakura rudely.

Karin shook her head, vowing to buy Sakura something as well (like food; Karin refused to live in a house without plenty of things to eat). The air outside was cold against her bare skin and Karin looked around, seeing the flash of a large department store sign nearly five blocks away. Karin thought on it for a moment--Sakura wasn't around, and she'd been given permission to go shopping--who cared if she used a little magic? Ducking into the alley on the side of the diner, Karin raised her fingers, snapping them together and closing her eyes as the ground surged under her.

The girl opened her eyes to a massive building, full of clear glass windows and beautiful clothing. Grinning, Karin rolled her shoulders, ready to get some shopping done. She'd drop the bags off at Sakura's apartment before she returned to pick up the girl from work. Karin thought back on the tiny old bed that'd taken up the center of the room; she'd been needing to swing around to a furniture department as well after she discussed what items Sakura just couldn't live without and what Karin couldn't live _with_. Karin took a step towards the store and paused, listening to the coins dangling in her pocket. She'd need to deal with that _too_. Sasuke was going to get a piece of her mind when she called him tomorrow. Until Karin had gotten all the things she wanted and had exhausted her shopping needs, she'd be willing to wait around in Sakura's house for her to return--but once she was past that point, she'd be going to school with Sakura regardless of the girl's opinion on the matter.

If Karin was going to help Sakura find someone to love, she would need to scout the area. And that meant getting acquainted with all available boys. The smile returned to the girl's lips and she started towards the store once more, heading straight to the beauty department, mentally running over Sakura's complexion in her mind.

Well. This might actually be some fun after all.

* * *

Sakura turned the key into the lock, trying to ignore Karin's excited anticipation as the door swung open to reveal the dark room beyond. Sakura reached in and flipped on the lights, her hand freezing in shock as she took in the sight of some twenty odd bags--all from one of the most expensive stores in Konohagakure, she noted with abject horror--littering her kitchen and living room floors. Karin brushed past her into the room, tugging on her arm and leading her into the house, kicking the door shut behind her. "So, let's talk," the girl said, leading Sakura to the kitchen table and forcing her to sit.

"Talk?" Sakura croaked, unable to keep her eyes off the fancy symbol on the bags. "How much money did I give you?"

"Probably around ten million or so," Karin responded carelessly, waving her hand around. "That doesn't matter, what matters is what's going to happen here." When she'd successfully gotten Sakura's attention, Karin continued on. "I'm used to living nicely, and this hell hole is anything but that. I understand you can't move--but we _are_ going to make it nicer to live here." Karin leaned over into one of the bags, coming back and sliding a small pad of sticky-notes across to Sakura. "Mark the things you don't want me to get rid of with these - everything else I'm getting rid of tomorrow and buying new stuff. Don't worry; I have excellent taste, it'll look perfect."

Sakura, whose mind had gone pleasantly blank at _ten million or so_, nodded numbly. It _would_ be nice to have new furniture...She sighed heavily, attempting to prepare herself for a life that was about to start changing for the worse. "Alright, fine. You can get some new stuff--but there you're going to stop. I don't _want_ your help, I don't **need**," Karin snorted rudely. "--Your help," Sakura finished lamely.

"Lie to yourself all you want, Sakura, but I'm going to help you find what you need in life so I can get out of here."

"What I need in life is fancy furniture and tons of clothes?" Sakura asked her voice dry.

"No. But it helps. You haven't asked for anything in years, Sakura. It's okay to spoil yourself. I'm going to prove that to you."

"If you say so," Sakura said, unconvinced. The girl rubbed a hand across her face, looking older than seventeen and exhausted. "I need to do my homework, so I'll go around really fast and label everything I want, okay? Just...don't tell me how much money you spend tomorrow."

"Fine," Karin agreed, sticking her hand out over the table. "Shake on it?" Sakura nodded, smiling ruefully--it was the first time Karin had seen any sort of emotion on her face other than annoyance. "Nice doing business with you."

Sakura shook her head, grabbing the sticky notes and heading into the bedroom to mark the things she wanted. "Should I mark clothes?"

"I'll probably still get rid of them if their gross," Karin told her, shuddering at the memory of the drawers stuffed with ugly, worn clothing.

"Don't you dare." Sakura called out to her, though she didn't sound threatening. She'd pretty much resigned herself to fate at this point--it wasn't the first time life had dumped a mess into her hands. Only this time the mess was a bit more confusing and difficult to deal with than usual. She tossed the colored sticky notes into the air and caught them, pulling off the top one and tapping it onto the dresser's smooth top.

Might as well get started.

* * *

Wow. What the hell is this? Why am I putting _another damn story up_? Who knows.

...Leave love. Yeah.

Anyway. (wanders off)


End file.
